When you're a parent, it can feel like you're saying the same things over and over all day and your kids still aren't listening.

Today you'll learn six simple ways to change that.

These tips are geared more towards younger kids, like 2-3 year olds. But they can definitely be adjusted for older kids.

These tips are easy, don't cost anything, and make a huge difference.

Let’s jump into these tricks to help you navigate the terrific two's and three's!

1. Use short phrases

Pick out the important parts of your instructions and cut out the extra words.

Imagine you are learning a new language (which is exactly what your kids are doing).

You would probably be able to pick out specific words when they are spoken clearly and in short sentences. If a foreign friend speaks in long, winding sentences, you will have a harder time picking out the important parts.

It’s the same for your kid.

Try saying something like, “Time to go. Sneakers on.”

Doesn’t that sound so much better than, “We are already late and we need to stop for gas too. Get your shoes on because we have to go right now….” ?

Do your kid a favor, and cut out all the extra words.

2. Say their name first

I told you these tips were easy ;)

Don’t waste your breath anymore saying, ”Come here, COME HERE, COME HERE!!"

Instead, say their name and wait for some sort of acknowledgment. That can be simple eye contact or them asking, “What?” or “Yes?”

Then and only then tell them what you wanted to say.

If you don't start with their name, they are more likely to literally not have heard you so then they can't follow the instruction.

3. Give positive attention

Sometimes kids are like celebrities and they think, “any attention is good attention.”

If you don’t give them positive attention throughout the day, they might act out to just get any attention.

As you go about your day, catch them doing good things and give them a little shout-out. Try saying something like, “Thanks for putting your shoes on the first time” or “Wow, you are such a big helper!”

With that little positive reinforcement, they start to realize, “When I listen, she will notice.”

And everyone loves praise, right?

Trust me when I say your kid will listen much better when you focus on praise instead of punishment.

4. Talk quieter

This is probably the easiest trick of them all.

There can be a natural inclination to keep raising your voice.

They are talking, you talk over them. They get louder, you get LOUDER.

And then it becomes a wall of noise where no one can hear each other.

Turn the volume down a few notches and your children will lean in to hear what you are saying.

And the key to them listening is to make sure they actually heard you in the first place.

5. Prep them

Toddlers generally have no idea what is going on. When it’s time to go, they might not listen because all they think is: I have to stop what I’m doing :(

Make sure to let them know what to expect in a way they can understand.

Try talking about their upcoming day relative to their daily schedule instead of time.

For example, say “We are going to the park after snack” instead of “this afternoon.”

See the difference?

“After snack” is easier to understand than “this afternoon”.

PRO TIP: Use a visual timer to start building their understanding of time.

It’s just like an old-school kitchen timer, but the time left is demonstrated by a brightly-colored sliver. This way, they get to see how long they have left before moving on.

A visual timer is a good idea for all kids, and is a game-changer for kids who struggle with transitions. You can always point to the timer and say, “the timer says it’s time to move on”.

The timer’s the bad guy, not you ;)

The more you prepare them in ways they can understand, the more likely they are to listen because they are less likely to feel surprised by what is going on.

6. Say instead of ask

We all know “no” is a toddler’s favorite word.

When given a yes or no question, 99% of the time, they will choose no.

Spare yourself the headache and change your “yes/no question” into a statement.

Instead of asking, “Do you want to put your shoes on?”…

Try, “Time for shoes!” And follow up with a choice of two like, “Do you want Paw Patrol or Frozen shoes?”

If they keep wanting to do something that is off the table, simply say, “That is not an option” and repeat their two choices.

Voila! You have created some boundaries and given them some independence.

Conclusion

Not listening is pretty much a given for children of all ages.

Changing the way you say things, though, can make a big difference.

The key is consistency.

Start with your favorite tip and see if you notice your child listening more.

Would you like help using these tips in your daily life?